Before & After – A New Mindset

“Rejoice in hope, endure in affliction, persevere in prayer,” Romans 12:12.

In the midst of the battle with death, with fear, with sickness, with cancer…

♥ I rejoiced in hope.  The hope that I had in God’s ability to heal and save.  The hope of my prayers being answered.  The hope of my faith producing the outcome I desired and believed I would receive.  The hope of another miracle. 

♥ I endured in affliction.  I endured through the pain of my life changing.  I endured through the pain and helplessness of seeing my loved ones suffer.  I endured through the exhaustion of the fight.  I endured through the emotional trauma of watching a loved one go through chemo.  I endured through the season of hardship.  I endured because of the hope to come; the healing I knew was coming.  The healing that was promised to my loved ones, to my family, to me.  I endured because of hope. 

♥ I persevered in prayer.   I persevered in prayer when I was tired.  I persevered in prayer when things looked hopeless.  I persevered in prayer because of my faith in God and his healing power.  I persevered in prayer because I believed God’s word to be the truth.  I persevered in prayer because faithful prayer brings miracles; I needed a couple.  I persevered in prayer when I was tired.  I persevered in prayer when I didn’t feel like praying.  I persevered in prayer because faithful, persistent prayer moves the hand of God.  I persevered in prayer because my loved ones needed it.  I persevered in prayer because God requires it.  I persevered in prayer even when it felt forced.  I persevered in prayer because I needed God to come through for my family and me.  Because I needed something from him…

Since grandma’s passing…

♥ I rejoice in the hope of glory.  I rejoice in the promise of eternal life.  I rejoice in the promise of seeing grandma again.  I rejoice in breaking free from the curse.  I rejoice in all that awaits me in Heaven.  I rejoice because my suffering is not in vain.  I rejoice in God’s grace and love.  I rejoice in Jesus’ sacrifice. 

♥ I endure in the affliction of grief.  I endure in the face of doubt.  I endure through my heartache.  I endure through crippling fear.  I endure through confusion.  I endure through the battle of keeping my faith.  I endure through this new season of questions without answers.  I endure through this learning process.  I endure through these growing pains.  I endure through the pain of seeing my family torn apart.  I endure through the pain of broken-ness.  I endure through my Father’s discipline.  I endure through blind rage.  I endure through hopelessness.  I endure through rebellion.  I endure through the, “why me’s?’.  I endure because I have no choice…

♥ I persevere through the temptation and hurt so that I can continue to pray.  I persevere through the doubt and confusion that have been brought on by unanswered prayer.  I persevere in the face of failure.  I persevere in the direction of a new faith.  I persevere in my relationship with God.  I persevere through the pain of reading the Bible and going to church.  I persevere in my walk with God.  I persevere in keeping my heart and mind open to the truth of God’s word.  I persevere in listening to God’s voice.  I persevere in keeping my spirit open to God.  I persevere in my family relationships.  I persevere through the struggles of daily life.  I persevere so that I will overcome.  I persevere because God promised me hope and a future and he promised me good.  I persevere because the alternative is quitting and I won’t quit.  I persevere in my journey to know God more.  God won’t give up on me and I refuse to give up on him.  I persevere because I know that God is still good.  I know that he still loves me.  I know that he will never leave me or forsake me.  I persevere because I know that God has a plan that is far beyond my realm of understanding.  I persevere because this is the life I am called to.  I persevere because Jesus did and he is my role model.  I persevere because I am not called to an easy life.  I persevere because those who hold on until the end will reap a harvest of blessings in Heaven.  I persevere in prayer because prayer is communication with God.  Without God my life is meaningless.  Without God I am lost.  I persevere in prayer because I know that God is the only one who will heal my heart and restore my family.  I persevere in prayer because my grandma would want me to.  I persevere in prayer because I miss my grandma and she is with God.  I persevere in prayer because I want to know God more.  I want my faith to grow, no matter how painful it is.  I want to be who I am called to be.  To go where I am called to go.  To fulfill my destiny in Christ.  I want all that God has for me and without prayer that is impossible… 

Maybe this is what it’s all about.  It’s about spiritual growth.  It’s about gaining godly wisdom and understanding.  It’s about the purpose of trials.  It’s about the outcome of suffering.  It’s not all about me or what I want.  It’s not about my plans, my hopes, my desires.  It’s about the life God has called me to.  It’s about the Kingdom of God and the greater good.  It’s about the life to come, not this one.  It’s about storing up treasures in Heaven and not on this earth.  It’s about salvation.  It’s about getting free of myself and my “junk”.  It’s learning how to let Christ strengthen me so that I can do what he has called me to do.  It’s about living for him, by him, and with him.  It’s about being salt and light in this world.  It’s about obedience and surrender.  It’s about what God wants.  It’s about his master plan.  It’s about dying to myself and being alive in Christ.  It’s about so much more than the here and now.  It’s about change and transformation.  It’s about fighting for faith and fighting with faith.  It’s about a new kind of trust, a deeper and more secure trust.  It’s about a new me.  It’s about letting God use me.  It’s about the process and what it will produce.  It’s about giving myself to God – honestly and completely and not looking back.  It’s not about what I can get from God but what I can give to God.  Ultimately, it’s all about God, not Aimie.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come:  The old has gone, the new is here,” 2 Corinthians 5:17!

 

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2 thoughts on “Before & After – A New Mindset

  1. I loved this post! You are such a talented writer!!! I’m so sorry for everything your going thru right now. Please don’t hesitate to call me if you want to talk or just vent. Love you Aims!!!

  2. Pingback: God reaches out to you in every way possible « Transient Reflections

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